It Tugs At My Soul...Part I

I remember that night so vividly, it was a Tuesday and I had just driven my busted up Chevy Cavalier all the way from the Southside of Chicago and landed on the planet they called the Westside. C’s Mom had just left to go to work and I was playing “patti cake” with her 2 little girls. After successfully putting the girls to bed C and I were ready to indulge in what I really made the journey for…a night of unbridled debauchery. Despite the numerous “mommy I can’t sleep, mommy can we sleep with you?” interruptions we were determined. But there was something about this night that will always have a hold on me.
C and I meet in ’94; we were co-workers and quickly became good friends. We ate lunch together daily and would entertain each other with deep thoughts of a future that seemed so distant. I was a recent graduate of Olive-Harvey College and was trying to find my place and she had just removed herself from a relationship with the father of her two children. We were both employed by the Chicago Tribune in the mail room which I was desperately, achingly trying to escape. I would constantly submit resumes to different entities of the Trib Company and when the rejections came C was always there to encourage me. C was just trying to survive, still living with her Mom she thirsted for a sense of freedom but with two children she felt defeated.
C had beautiful brown eyes and possessed a smile that was infectious; it didn’t take long for me to eventually fall for her. But I was caught between a rock and a need to be loved. See, I was already in a relationship that was at the time 2 years too long but I wasn’t ready to leap just yet. Hope kept whispering to me and I still wanted to listen. But I wanted to take this journey with C…wanted to enjoy her touch, her smile just a little longer.